If last night’s It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia left you wondering what an uncensored dick towel looks like and where you could get one, I’ve got some good news. Looks like Mac and Dennis put together a little infomercial to advertise their new product.
I understand that one needs to step their game up during the playoffs but this girl for New Mexico looks like she’s got a vendetta against Mormons. Maybe those guys in short sleeved shirts and ties knocked on her door one to many times.
Fuck, I would kill to have the Shat-attack read some of my tweets on Conan. I’d like to think some of my tweets are pretty funny but they’re all probably a little to coherent to qualify for a Shatner reading.
My question to the guy videotaping is, “Why didn’t you stop and fill up your truck full of beer?” There is obviously protocol that must be taken if you are on the scene following an accident involving a beer truck: First, call the police. Second, videotaping the accident scene. Third, “help” clean up the mess by putting the beer in your trunk.
Rain, sleet and snow are no problem but three times the legal limit of booze in your system while trying to deliver the mail can be a real motherfucker.
Police found Kevin Crocilla, 29, passed out in his mail truck along the side of the road. Kevin told the cops that he had drank wine all night and then a half a bottle of mouthwash in the morning to cover up his two-buck-chuck breath.
Kevin was so fucked up he couldn’t keep his eyes open during the field sobriety test and he fell back asleep in the middle of a conversation with the cops. The cops gave him a couple of breathalyzers and he blew a .264 and a .258.
Kevin, buddy, call in a take a goddamn sick day. You were obviously in the middle of one of a bender so there is no reason to fuck up your momentum by showing up to work. Don’t get me wrong I appreciate the dedication but nobody needs their mail from your drunk ass that bad.
I enjoyed the awesomeness that is tailgating at this kick ass RV many times myself. Sure other people may bring beer, maybe even a keg but I can guarantee you are going to the only person in the lot with an external keg tap for easy access to that keg of delicious brew. You will be the talk of the tailgate lot as people walk by and say, “Wait….Is that a beer tap on the side?”
Looking for the ultimate in tailgating / outdoor recreation experiences? Look no further. This 20′ Dodge Open Road is a one of a kind. Customized interior paint, carpet, and window trimmings “tactfully” done in crimson and gray is only the beginning.
The Ride: 20′ with side hatch door. 350 V8 runs STRONG. Sleeps six comfortably on three beds. Four burner stove, oven, propane/electric fridge, and all necessary kitchen accessories. Full bath in back. Tires are nearly new with 80% tread. Mileage is 98,000 (or 198,000 or 298,000… only a 5 digit odometer). But we’ve never had a problem with the engine. Brakes just tightened.
The Extras: Everything you need to party. Fully customized external keg tapping system with CO2 setup. Four tap handles included. Coleman generator. Weber hibachi grill. Two tables that will accommodate 5 on 5 flip cup matches. CD player with new speakers mounted. There’s not much more you could ask for.
The pictures attached are before most improvements were made. The paint on the interior and exterior has been touched up. The final picture is the type of John Husky you will likely encounter trying to mooch free beer at Apple Cup.
If you’ve been to New York City and had the experience of riding the subway, you may have come across a performer just trying to make a couple bucks. Usually they start with a friendly greeting to the subway car and then go into their song, music or dance. Mr. Move here decides to start with a question, “Who wants a titty full of beer?” Maybe inappropriate for some on the NYC subway, but definitely appropriate for online video!
Yesterday Baba Ganoush covered his favorite Halloween costume so today I figured I would post mine. Sure it doesn’t involve a celebrity but it does involve a couple of nerds that dropped their buddy for a couple of better “o”s. I bet poor “oo” is over in the corner near the bar pounding Sea Breezes and plotting revenge against these two bastards.
If you’re promoting shoes that make your ass look better, it’s probably not a good idea to hire a horn-dog cameraman. Obviously this is the idea behind the Reebok commercial for their new EasyTone shoes. But seriously, the ass-close-ups are a little offensive and crude. And awesome. Judge for yourself:
I’m always looking to help out my fellow boozehounds. I don’t drink a whole lot of wine but I don’t know anyone that hasn’t found themselves with wine and no corkscrew at one time or another. This drunk French guy shows you how to solve this age old conundrum by using nothing more than a shoe and a solid surface.
I know Halloween was so three days ago, but this post-Halloween week is spent checking out Facebook and the celebrity blogs to see all the costumes. Yesterday I came across Kim Kardashian in her Princess Jasmine costume. The search for the best Halloween costume was over. You win, Kim. Congrats!
I think this lady is certifiably batshit crazy. Just like yesterday this lady brought this on herself. She actually drove up to three police cars gathered in a church parking lot and offered to survey any homes or property the cops might own. Then things got weird.
When Grob approached her car, she stated she “knew what I needed” and produced an Outback Steak House menu, the report said. Asked for her drivers license, she handed the deputy her wallet without the license. She then located the license and offered Grob her Blue Cross card without being asked for insurance information, the report said.
Directed to do a one-leg stand, the woman “began to ‘dance with the stars,’ grabbed me and twirled herself several times and attempted to rub on my legs using her butt,” the report said.
Not surprising that the fuzz found two empty pints of vodka on the passenger side floorboard of her car along with a wine glass. Hey if you’re going to drink some vodka and drive there is no reason to look like a hay seed, might as well class it up by sipping your fine spirits out of wine glass.
I know Halloween was so three days ago, but this post-Halloween week is spent checking out Facebook and the celebrity blogs to see all the costumes. Yesterday I came across Kim Kardashian in her Princess Jasmine costume. The search for the best Halloween costume was over. You win, Kim. Congrats!
