A Monday Rant

So it appears that very soon the state of Washington will put a law on the books that will require drivers to use a handsfree set if they are talking on their cell phone while driving. This is just fine with me since most of the idiots I encounter out on the road can barely handle operating an automobile as it is. A few of my friends have said “It is just a conspiracy to sell more Bluetooth headsets.” and they could be right.

I have taken the long road to start this rant so let’s get down to business. When the fuck did it become acceptable to walk around all day with a goddamn Bluetooth headset hanging off your ear like a parasite? I agree that Bluetooth headsets are great when you are driving your car and dodging pedestrians. However I go to business conference after business conference and find more and more people who wear their Bluetooth headset like it’s a watch. This is not okay. It has to stop. You look like a jackass. If you are not using the headset for a conversation take the damn thing off. I can’t look at you and take you seriously during a face to face conversation with that goddamn thing on your ear. I want to smack it off like it’s a bee.

This leads me to my second cell phone gripe. The cell phone on the belt. Are you trying to look like Batman with a kick ass utility belt? I understand how this trend got started. Cell phones used to be roughly the size and shape of a brick but these days you can get a phone that is barely bigger then a stack of business cards. You have a wallet that’s an 1 ½ inches thick stuck in your back pocket that looks like a tumor growing off your ass but you have to clip your 98 millimeter RAZR to your belt? What kind of shit is that? What are your front pockets so full of that you have to clip the phone to your belt? I carry two phones (8525 / Blackberry Pearl) and they both manage to fit in one front pant pocket.

Man I feel better after that, lighter on my toes.