I have always loved the comedy of George Carlin. Check out this site with some of his best quotes.
14. The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.â€
32. Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
37. Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.
84. You can’t argue with a good blowjob.
87. Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to f*ck.





















