A dentist accused of fondling the breasts of 27 female patients is trying to keep his dental license by arguing that chest massages are an appropriate procedure in certain cases. Mark Anderson’s lawyer says dental journals discuss the need to massage the pectoral muscles to treat a common jaw problem.

Police say Anderson said during recorded phone calls that he routinely massaged patients’ chests to treat temporo-mandibular joint disorder, or TMJ, which causes neck and head pain.

I didn’t attend medical school but this makes about as much sense to me as saying that if you massage someone’s ass it will resolve their knee pain.

Here is one basic question that can solve this whole case before it even goes to court. Did any of the women complain about jaw pain? If so did this douche bag then explain that he felt a friendly chest rub would be the best way to cure it? The answer to both questions must be no otherwise we wouldn’t be here. How did this even go down? He must have got them loopy on some drugs, decided on his own they had jaw pain and then went right in for the breasts.

Don’t think for a minute that your standard over the shirt breast rub will cure this horrible TMJ.

…including one from a 31-year-old woman who said Anderson fondled her at least six times over two years.

She took to wearing tight shirts with high necklines, “and Anderson would still get in under her shirt and bra,” according to a police report.

You have to get underneath the bra to where the breast rubbing will be the most effective.

Despite these 27 complaints Anderson’s lawyers are arguing to get him back into his dental office.

Zaro said Anderson, 48, of Woodland, needs to keep seeing patients so he can feed his seven children and pay for his defense.

If you are so concerned about feeding your 7 children then maybe you should have thought of that before you fondled 54 breasts.

Original Story: MSNBC.com