Oh, HELL no…

Officials in Tennessee raided a bunch of warehouses in connection with potential robberies occuring at the nearby Jack Daniels distillery. They found thousands of bottles of JD, many of them vintage, over 100 years old. According to a police spokesperson, if it turns out that these bottles were involved in a theft, and were indeed being sold illegally, they will be destroyed.

The value of the liquor, especially considering its vintage, is estimated at around $1 million. One bottle alone dates to 1914, with an unbroken seal, bringing its worth to around $10,000! But fuck that! We know what the real tragedy here is. It’s pure, golden, baby-making, shout-inducing wife-swapping JACK DANIELS!! You can’t just pour it out!! This is much more of a crime than the entrepeneur that liberated the bottles from the distillery. For God sake, Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with Jack Daniels, that way he doesn’t have to spit!! You have to respect that…

This guy said it best:

“Punish the person, not the whiskey,” said an outraged Kyle MacDonald, 28, a Jack Daniel’s drinker from British Columbia who promotes the whiskey on his blog. “Jack never did anything wrong, and the whiskey itself is innocent.”

Amen, brother. 2400 bottles of vintage Jack would be a great donation a charity of Tastybooze’s choice. Possibly the Don’t Go To Work For A Year Foundation…

original story: WSMV Nashville