I logged into my Gmail this morning I find this ad at the top of the page for fake piss. Naturally I have to check it out.
Quick Fix Urine has one of those great sites where they are only giving a half-assed effort to hide the fact that they are trying to help people beat drug tests. The slogan at the top of the page reads “The Original Pre-Mixed Synthetic Urine! Totally Undetectable! Has Never Failed A Test!” Yet they then go on to explain all of the scientific reasons why you would want to spend $29.95 on 2 ounces of lab piss.
Instead of using expensive urine controls, Quick Fix Synthetic Urine provides a non toxic testing medium that mimics the characteristics of normal human urine. This lab produced synthetic urine can also be used for the calibration of urine testing equipment. Unlike natural urine Quick Fix can be heated up unlimited times.
Who the fuck do they think they are kidding with this shit? If you go to their Money Back page it details how you can send in your failed test results along with proof you followed all of the fake piss instructions and they will refund your money.
My favorite part of the page is the section titled Fetish. They take the time to explain that fake urine is popular with the fetish community because of health concerns. Really!? If you are going to let someone piss on you I am pretty sure the last thing you are worried about is health concerns. Is there some place out there that makes lab created shit for all those folks that love a good Cleveland Steamer but have health concerns? Doubtful.
{ 1 trackback }
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Doesn’t gmail pick what ads to display based on the content of your email?
Something you’re not telling us, Mitch?
The fake piss actually works better than detoxifiers, water pills or niacin. If you are trying to get a job, it’s better to go with synthetic piss than anything else…all you have to do is add water and mix. Most actually come with a small hot pack to get it to the temp you need…its a potheads dream
Just wanted to say thanks for posting a link to the site, I do think it’s pretty funny what google suggests sometimes in GMail