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Two Years on a Toilet Seat

by Baba Ganoush on March 14, 2008

toilet.jpgYup, you read that correctly, TWO YEARS! That’s how long a woman in Wichita, Kansas, spent sitting on the toilet seat in her boyfriend’s bathroom. Being a good boyfriend, the man continued to bring her food and water, but she wouldn’t budge from the throne and kept telling him that “maybe tomorrow” would be the day she would leave the bathroom.

After two years, the boyfriend finally called the police a couple of weeks ago. And after two years, you would be amazed at what happens…essentially, the toilet seats becomes a part of you:

Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman’s skin had grown around the seat. … “We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital.”

Now I’m starting to feel guilty for writing this post. I know everyone enjoys a little quiet time in the bathroom to do their business, sometimes you lose track of time and don’t realize how long you’ve been in there, but two years!?!?! And what was the final straw that enough was enough, that’s what I want to know! Or the fact that they still consider themselves boyfriend/girlfriend, I would draw the line at 30 minutes. Anything more and there is something obviously wrong with you.

Original story: The Seattle Times.

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Mitch Martin March 14, 2008 at 9:52 am

I don’t know 30 minutes might be a little short. Sometimes if you have a little extra fiber or you get to a really good part of your book you need some extra time to work things out.

How in the hell do you let that go on for two years? I would have called someone after one to two days.

FrankTheTank March 14, 2008 at 10:23 am

Dude, you know that both the girl and the guy are mentally disabled, right? Not cool…

Also, can we get a Tasty Booze Reader poll: Longest you have even been on a toilet. (I’d also be curious as to how “time on pot” correlates to different races, ethnicities and geographies, but maybe that’s a separate post for Brasky)

Wikipedia March 14, 2008 at 10:33 am

@Frank:

The article closes with “Authorities said they did not know if she was mentally or physically disabled.”

Still… not a good excuse.

Mitch Martin March 14, 2008 at 10:34 am

Maybe when she initiated her business she didn’t realize the bathroom was out of shit tickets and she was to embarrassed to say anything.

Mr. Wonka March 14, 2008 at 4:57 pm

what about 2 years of shitting on the comment section of every tastybooze post? FrankTheTank is well on his way, and I think he could pull it off!

I do second the poll idea though.

John Austin TX Personal trainer March 15, 2008 at 10:07 am

They are thinking of charging the boyfirend. They should charge the girl with trespassing.

The boyfriend is an enabler. All he had to do was to stop feeding her. She would eventually get up. He is about as bizarre as she is. They were made for each other. They ought to make a movie. It would be a love story and it would involve only one set,

John Austin TX Personal trainer March 15, 2008 at 10:08 am

They are thinking of charging the boyfriend. They should charge the girl with trespassing.

The boyfriend is an enabler. All he had to do was to stop feeding her. She would eventually get up. He is about as bizarre as she is. They were made for each other. They ought to make a movie. It would be a love story, and it would involve only one set.

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