Some ass clown in Louisiana is fighting the local city council for his right to wear a skirt while mowing his lawn. He claims to have a “medical condition” (read heat rash) and the skirt allows the sweat to evaporate. I’ve got no problem with this guy rolling around his yard in his Juicy Couture mini-skirt but why does he have to recreate Sharon Stone’s scene from Basic Instinct?

Grow up; Count Chocula, Peter Pan. Every guy would love to be able to catch a cool breeze on his junk but society doesn’t allow that. Slap on a goddamn pair of boxer shorts underneath that thing. Then you’ll still be able to catch a breeze without showing off your wrinkly ball sack to all the neighborhood kids.