“It looks like she actually caught air, because the front half of the car made it across the pool.”

I don’t know how she did it but she almost cleared the goddamn pool. You know you are piss drunk when you crash into a pool and then forget that you are in a pool by the time you decide to get out of the car.

The driver, Nicole Renee Carlin, 36, left, who appeared unharmed, opened her door and promptly fell into the water.

Once the pool owner helped Nicole out of the water she bolted into his house through the back sliding door and then out the front door. The home owner was going to give chase but he heard sirens approaching and Nicole was reportedly trying to crawl through some shrubs. When the troopers caught up with her Nicole she was clueless about her night.

She told a trooper she didn’t know where she had been drinking but “she had way too many,” the report says.

Yeah, no shit sweetheart, did you arrive at the brilliant deduction before or after you put your SUV into someone’s pool?

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Original Story: TampaBay.com