That is a 2002 BMW M3 coupe. I could list all the specs and accessories that the chucklehead selling it has bolted on but we don’t sell cars here at Tasty Booze so we will skip that bullshit and get right to the good part of the ad.

This car has gotten me laid so much it is ridiculous. I would like pull up to a pimp club in Scottsdale and the valet would crap his pants, but I wouldn’t let him park it. I just leave it up front and make sure all the ladies saw me get out. I’m also totally ripped so that helps too. I inject myself with pure bull shark testosterone and lift 4 hours a day. My diet also consists of 24 egg whites a day. I’ve got a killer 6 pack and some delts that you would not believe. I only hook up with 9s and 10s. Never less because I’m a winner! I’m not saying this car will do the same for you but it’s a start. If you’re interested in taking the first step to becoming a true Jedi Pimp email me at conner.john2@gmail.com. I’ll probably be working out so I’ll get back to you as soon as I finish my protein shake (and probably hooking up with a hot chick).

I would be willing to bet this guy looks exactly like Joey Porsche but with about 30 lbs of extra muscle. I searched both MySpace and Facebook hoping to find a profile associated to the email address given in the ad but I came up empty.

The good news is that CapitalOne would love to finance my quest to become a “Jedi-Pimp” the bad news is that I have no idea how I would get the jedi-pimp-mobile from AZ to WA.

Full Ad: AutoTrader