Having conquered the five bladed razor Gillete is taking the next logical step in the evolution of the razor and adding a flashlight. I am glad to see that they finally got off the lets-add-another-blade bandwagon but what the fuck am I going to do with a flashlight on my razor? Are there a whole lot of guys out there that are shaving in the dark? Don’t most guys shave in the same bathroom that is equiped with four or five 200 watt spotlights that their ladies use to exam every individual pore on their face?
I checked on Amazon and the standard 5 blade Fusion goes for about $15.50. So guess how much it is going to cost you to spotlight those little bastard whiskers before you drop five blades of cutting fury on them? $150. No that isn’t a mistake, I didn’t fuck up the decimal point. Gillete wants you to pay $150 for a razor that has a flashlight in it. For $150 I shouldn’t even have to touch the thing. It should just fly around my face and shave my neck so smooth that someone would walk up and tie a goddamn Cub Scout kerchief under it.
