In an attempt to (re)mix up their fall fashions like it was 1993, Sears has partnered with the rap legend LL Cool J to produce a fall line of clothes targeting children, teen girls and suburban white teenagers young men.

USA Today reported this earlier in the week and I learned two things from the article: LL Cool J has an album coming out in June and Sears sells clothes. Weird.

Anyway, my prediction for the LL Cool J (Ladies Love Cool James, for those of you who didn’t know) line of clothes is that they’ll progress about the same way his career has:

1. Clothing line will be named with a similar format: MWW Cool H (Must Wear With Cool Hats)

2. Initial season of clothes will be bangin’, so much so that your mama will knock you out.

3. Clothing line will be challenged by a rival line, made entirely of Hemp. MWW Cool H will prevail and spark a brief up-turn in sales.

4. Product placement in shows on the CW and over-hyped movies will diminish street cred of clothing line.

5. Sears claims MWW Cool H “greatest clothing line of all-time,” despite common sense.

6. MWW Cool H hopes for retro revival due to overstocking of clothing line at Goodwill/Savers.

7. In a counter move, Target and Wal-Mart… oh wait, they didn’t know Sears sold clothes either. Nevermind.

Original Article: USA Today