Our friends at Holy Taco have put together a brilliant list the Top 16 Penalties By College Freshmen. And it really took me back to the day. Some of my favorites:
- Penalty: Trying to impress people with your DJ skills. I actually knew some of these guys (and still do). However, this is a penalty because 1) it makes you a douchebag and 2) you actually suck at it. Funny though.
- Penalty: Asking annoying questions that delay the end of class. I almost had to fight someone once after class for this. There is no more urgent need in the world than to be able to leave class once it is over. Every 30 seconds you are forced to stay late somehow feels like 5 minutes.
- Penalty: Jacking off while your roommate is asleep. This one is like the NFL. It’s only a penalty if you get caught.
- Penalty: Standing at the door asking people for keg money. I know you are poor. But if you want people to like you and come to your lame parties, let them have the beer for free.
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I would add “heading back from the party early to steal beer from any fridge that doesn’t have a lock on it.”
still wearing your high school letterman jacket.