I just wanted to take this chance to wish all of our readers a Happy New Year! Things will probably be a little light around here for the first couple days of ‘09 while we enjoy a long weekend. Personally I’m heading into the mountains to do a little cross country skiing and see if I can burn off a few of the 13 pounds of tortilla chips I consumed in Mazatlan last week.
Looking back 2008 was a banner year for Tasty Booze. We saw a 670% increase in traffic over 2007 and signed an affiliate deal with Break.com. We finished the year with over 2 million unique visits and almost 4 million pageviews. Sure some sites eat those numbers for breakfast but I’m proud of the solid reader base that we have built. As Winston Wolf would say, “Well, let’s not start sucking each other’s dicks quite yet.” If we managed 670% in 2008 that means at a bare minimum we have to match that growth in 2009.
Do to my constant tinkering the site when through no less that six redesigns and although we just had another I’m sure there will be more in 2009. In fact if you have some web design/graphic skills and would like to help out (yes, we can pay) hit me up at my email address to the right.
Alright enough “State of Tasty Booze” bullshit. Hit the piss tonight, have some fun and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Happy New Year!
Everyone get your tinfoil hats and prepare for the apocalypse. Something is oozing out of the ground and water that is causing rainbows in common backyard sprinklers. Twenty years ago you would never see something like this and now rainbows are everywhere. Metal oxides….visible spectrum….don’t let them take our rights!
Today in the links we have a Christmas prank gone wrong, a scary cell phone gun, 26 shameless pick up lines and the dorkiest pictures you’ve ever seen.
Here the are the top 10 most popular posts on Tasty Booze based on the number of pageviews each received in 2008. Every post on the list broke the 50k pageview mark handedly which is pretty good considering we would be hard pressed to find a single 50k pageview post in 2007. Even if you saw them the first time check them out again, they’re all just as funny the second time around.
Step 2: Walk around the party all night blowing into your iPhone’s mic so that every can see/hear your virtual party horn.
I’m not just trying to rag on iPhone owners here. This is one of those things that should just be a common sense bad idea. Flaunting this around the party tonight is going to be the quickest way to ensure you have no one to kiss at midnight.
They’ve got more seats to sell and they’re cheaper to boot. LeatherCreations placed this slice of marketing genius in the Chicago Tribune recently. Hey, they’ve got a point with their “Plus this sofa lasts much longer than 6 years.” line.
Generally we fill this space with a couple of hot girls and ask you to decide which one is hotter. I thought it would be a little more seasonal/appropriate to change things up a little today. Don’t worry the ladies will be back next week.
We’ve already reviewed the resolutions that never workout so now let’s flip that around and see which resolutions you think you can keep.
What New Year's Resolution Are You Most Likely To Keep?
Fuck Resolutions, There's Nothing Wrong With Me (43.0%, 88 Votes)
Hit The Gym Multiple Times A Week (25.0%, 51 Votes)
Quit Blacking Out On Work Nights (14.0%, 28 Votes)
Spend Less Time Looking At Internet Porn (13.0%, 26 Votes)
Nextround has put together a great list of the New Year’s resolutions that we fool ourselves with year after year. The entire list is worth a read but there are definitely a few that I think ring particularly true with our readers here at Tasty Booze. Hit the link below to see the full list.
Today in the links we have 6 stores someone would like to see go bankrupt, the 10 most disturbing animals on earth, advice from Illuminati and the real dangers of mixing alcohol.
Yeah, this is a good idea. Although, I will give them credit for at least having the sense to put the alcohol in the backseat. From the looks of these guys though, it’s hard to tell who (if anyone) in this group would have the brains to think up this brilliant idea.
It’s that time of year when people start trotting out their New Year’s resolutions which generally involve grandiose schemes to change their life. I don’t believe in resolutions because 99% of the time people are just setting themselves up for failure. If you haven’t been to the gym in months you’re not doing yourself any good by saying that on January 3rd you’re going to start going 5 days a week. Sure you might last a week or two but pretty soon your ass is going to be back on the couch. I believe in setting realistic attainable goals like maybe you’ll start going to the gym 2 days a week and will work up to the 5 days a week. With that in mind I’ve created my drinking goals for 2009. Some will be harder to complete than others but they are all clearly defined goals that I can drink work towards and the new year progresses.
Open and close a bar
I’m not talking about stopping in for a cheery morning pint before work and then stopping back by for a night cap. I’m talking about being the first person to belly-up in the morning and being the last one the bartender asks to leave. This is the kind of thing that really tests a drinker’s mettle and it’s all about pacing yourself. A seat at the end of the bar is key so that you can pass day watching your fellow patrons go by.
Send a nice bottle of booze to a buddy
Sure the economy might be in the shitter but everyone loves free booze and I can scrounge up some extra coin to make a friend smile. Just a nice bottle of booze with a card that says, “Tonight the buzz is on me.”
Become a regular somewhere
Generally becoming a “regular” involves a lot of drinking and a lot of tips. That means that the optimum bar to gain “regular” status at is one close to home. The two bars within walking distance of my home are located in chain restaurants and those don’t count. I’m going to have hop in my horseless carriage, find a local dive and start making some friends.
Buy a bottle of Jade Verte Suisse 65 Absinthe
This isn’t about hallucinations of trying to reach my inner Hemingway or Van Gogh. It’s about getting a nice bottle of booze that has to be sent from Europe and then sharing it with friends so that everyone can say they’ve had a true absinthe experience. [Read more →]
…for people to make asses of themselves in the snow. Now that the winter weather is sweeping across the U.S., people will find a new way to do stupid shit. Although I doubt this incident takes place in the U.S., let this be a lesson to you all. If you are planning on attempting a stunt that involves the snow, be sure to videotape it so we can all laugh at you later. Thanks!
DJ Earthworm compiled this pretty sweet song/video mashup of Billboard’s top 25 popular songs for 2008. I think I counted at least 5 different T-Pain sightings but there could have been other songs/videos that he worked on that I didn’t recognize. Trust me, that amount of work this took alone is worth your four minutes and 30 seconds.
If receiving over 65% of the vote can be considered a landslide then this was a bloodbath. Jennifer Aniston “now”, specifically her GQ cover photo for the January 2009 issue, destroyed her old self with 92% of the vote. It’s not surprising at all especially if you saw the “then” photo. It’s hard to believe that at almost 40 years of age she is arguable hotter than when her haircut took the world by storm on Friends.
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