Unless you’re practicing keg stands alone, you should probably have some help with your buddies holding you up. You know it’s not going to end well, with a weird bracing on the shack behind him and the one-arm on the keg. Good thing he drank enough to probably absorb some of the pain of his face-plant.

We linked to this yesterday, but it is so good that I had to post it again. Amazing things can be done with super glue. It’s always handy to have a little around the house.

And we all know the weatherman is never wrong. Especially when he really strokes it….

Ah, summertime. A great time to sit back with a beer and watch people doing stupid things on the water.

Flaming shots are great visuals, but drinking them and just serving them can be dangerous. In fact, many bars and clubs have stopped serving them altogether due to the fire hazard. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that lighting fires around a shit ton of alcohol is never a good idea. Well, if the bars/clubs won’t do it, why not try it at home…nothing bad is going to happen…right… (Headphones recommended).

Obviously there are only two outcomes for this type of video; either the guy is going to get hurt, or he’s going to do something really cool. I tend to bet on the guy getting hurt. I was right on this one, but I never could have guessed how it was going to happen…

If you came up with a number that is anywhere north of $800k don’t travel to Romania to save a few bucks on an operation. A surgeon in Romania was recently ordered by a court to pay $795,000 to a patient after he accidentally cut a patient’s schlong off. The surgeon was supposed to be performing some kind of testicular operation but instead of slicing into the ball sack he took the scalpel to the man’s member.

I don’t understand how a medically trained doctor cuts the dick instead of the balls. It reminds me of the scene in Something About Mary when Ben Stiller gets his balls stuck in his zipper and the step-dad yells, “Oh man! How’d you get the beans above the frank?”

The real bitch of this whole thing is that the patient is only 33 years old and they weren’t able to re-attach his dick. I don’t know if this dipshit of a surgeon just shredded the thing or maybe dick reattachment surgery isn’t that advanced in Romania. I mean didn’t they find John Wayne Bobbit’s dick in the middle of a field and they still managed to get it back on? Doctors in Romania took “a piece of muscle from the man’s arm has now been attached to where his penis was, but its function is aesthetic.”

So the poor bastard has a bulge but no pop.

Original Story: MSNBC.com

I’ve seen plenty of bottle rocket dumbasses in my time, but this is the first numbnuts I’ve seen who actually sticks the thing in his asshole. Serious? Everyone else I’ve seen do the bottle rocket in the ass trick usually sticks it in his ass crack, not the actual anus. Oh well, his pain is our gain…

Let’s see here. You’re in what looks like a kickass golf cart/mini-gator and you decide to climb the steepest hill around. First, you roll up to do a little assessment of steepness using minimal power. It’s steep. So you give it a second little test run with a little more power and manage to get your front wheels over what appears to be a fallen tree. Hmmm, still steep. Third try’s the charm, right? So you punch the gas, jump your mini-gator and almost do a backflip, but roll down safely. Damn, that’s a steep hill. Better give it one more shot. No guts, no glory.

Lynne Rice, 74, drove her 1988 land yacht Cadillac through the front of a convenience store last night causing about $8K worth of damage. Undeterred by her less than orthodox park job Lynne hopped out of the caddy and proceeded over to the cooler case where she picked up a six pack of Bud Heavies. Being the upstanding citizen that she is Lynn proceeded to the counter and tried to pay for her refreshing beverages.

What I am guessing was one pissed off store clerk refused to sell the beer to Lynne and the 5’4” 112 pound women reportedly pushed him as a result of his refusal. Police showed up a few minutes later and Lynne was arrested on suspicion of DUI, big surprise. It’s doesn’t take a huge feat of logic to deduce that someone who can nonchalantly drive through a plate glass window and then go for more beer is probably rolling with a pretty serious buzz.

I would pay money to see the surveillance footage of this. Did this little old lady just climb out of the car like nothing was wrong and head over to the cooler?

Original Story: Press Telegram

You gotta love watching kids play sports. So uncoordinated, but impossible not to watch. Hank Yerzimbeck did something similar to me when we were little, but he used a real, metal bat. That was not a good day.

A 42-year-old Spokane, Wash., man accidentally shot himself in the face yesterday. The man, who was hanging out with his friends and throwing back a couple drinks, was playing around with the gun when a member of the group expressed concern about the firearm being toyed with. In an attempt to prove the gun was unloaded, the man pointed the gun at his face and pulled the trigger. He is now in critical condition at a local hospital.

Words cannot describe the stupidity involved here.

Just another friendly TastyBooze reminder for the weekend, if you’re going to play with guns this weekend, making it the water variety.

Original Story: The Seattle Times

Check out this billboard in London being put up just a few hours before the premiere of Will Smith’s new movie Hancock. I bet the workers putting this sign up had a pretty good laugh when they stopped to puff a cigarette.

I’ve got to admit that “Cock: Not Your Average Superhero” would be a pretty goddamn catchy porn title. I’m just saying I would watch it.

Original Story: The Sun

A new twist on an old game - the gunney sack race. This one is a little harder though as your legs are wrapped down to the ankles. It could possibly make you trip and fall. Helmets are a good idea.

I think the idea here was to do a front flip after planting on the wall mat. Keep at it, kid. It’s hard to become a ninja..