Yesterday was a sad day for Seattle sports fans. One Clay Bennett took away the Seattle Supersonics to Oklahoma City. The City of Seattle and the Sonics ownership came to a settlement in the lease agreement for Key Arena, allowing the Sonics to relocate to Oklahoma City. The Seattle Times has more details on the situation.

Although we’ve already started to adopt the Portland Trailblazers as our new home team, this was still a sad day for Seattle…losing the only major professional sports team to bring a national championship to the city (no offense Seattle Storm). So many classic memories and feelings are summed up in this video:

Clay Bennett, you’ve just received the Douchebag of the Week honors. Asshole.

Once out from the oppressive administration at colleges and universities, those partaking in somewhat organized co-ed sports leagues are forced to come up with their own creative and usually offensive or crude team names. Co-Ed Sports are a past-time for the quarter-lifers and is even called out as #65 of Stuff White People Like. Girls enjoy the opportunity to participate in sports for the semi-competitive atmosphere or their boyfriends are making them do it. Guys love the competitiveness no matter how drunk much the other team doesn’t care and it’s also their last hope at getting discovered for the MLB/NFL/NBA/PBA/MLS.

Gone are the simple team names from your adolescence, like “Wildcats,” “Bears,” “[Local Professional Sports Team Name],” and “Yankees.” Balls, poles, bases, bats, runs, and scoring, are turned into euphemisms for male genitalia, male genitalia, female genitalia, male genitalia, fecal matter, and mom jokes. Put a couple of these together and you have yourself a pretty clever team name.

TastyBooze staff members have played in numerous co-ed sports leagues (current team is Wu-Tang themed, Wu-Tang ain’t nothing to fuck wit!) and we’ve come up with our list of favorite team names below.

25 – I Scored With Your Mom (Baseball/Softball)
24 – Freebasers (Baseball/Softball)
23 - Back Dat Pass Up (Football/Soccer)
22 – Multiple Scorgasm (Any Sport)
21 – Triple Penetration (Bowling)
20 – Masterbatters (Baseball/Softball)
19 – Suck My Kick (Kickball/Soccer)
18 – Long Poles and Deep Holes (Golf)
17 – 2 Balls 1 Cup (Golf)
16 – Kick Tease (Kickball/Soccer)

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First Shaq wins a ring without Kobe. Then Kobe gets embarrassed in the NBA finals. Now Shaq is calling out Kobe in his latest rap. This past Sunday, Shaq was freestyling at an NYC club and decided he had a few thoughts for Kobe.

Thought number 1: “Last week, Kobe couldn’t do it without me”

Thought number 2: “That’s the difference between first and last place. Kobe, how my ass taste?”

Thought number 3: “I’m a horse. Kobe ratted me out, that’s why I’m getting a divorce”

Two things to note. One, Kobe proved last week that he is certainly no Michael Jordan. And two, Shaq needs to not rap anymore. Ever. I’m serious. And he did get knocked out in the first round this year, so not sure it’s the best time to be starting the next big rap feud. Clearly Soulja Boy and Ice-T have staked claim on the lamest rap feud of 2008 already anyway.

Source: TMZ