Even if we don’t win the most gold medals in Beijing this year, at least we can all agree on who will get the most awesome president in attendance medal. That’s right, representing the United States, our hero George W. Bush. Of the following, let’s all guess what the most important thing on the mind of GWB is right now. Leave your answer in the comments.

- Russia stepping up its advance into Georgian territory

- The amazing display made by Chinese gymnasts on the rings

- The future of the Republican Party as an increasingly gaffe-prone McCain faces the next coming of JFK

- The rear-end of US female volleyball champion Misty May-Treanor

- Thousands of US troops embroiled in an Iraqi civil war with no end in sight

- Creative ways to get softball hotty Jennie Finch on his old Texas Rangers squad

I figured you guys could use a good waxing before the weekend. After seeing 40-Year Old Virgin, I can’t imagine how bad this must hurt down there, close to the va-jay-jay. Looks like he messed her up good. Gonna need more vodka.

Do you have trouble rationing your dick? Maybe your vagina is clocked out? Here is some advice (and yes, that is her mom)…

The staff at Colorado State University’s Rocky Mountain Collegian published an outstanding piece of jounalism today. Maybe they were looking to boost their pageviews and figured this would do it. Apparently they are getting some national media attention so I guess it worked.

In only four eloquent words (including the title) they combined this weeks buzz story (”Don’t taser me, bro!”) and what I take is a strong dislike for President Bush.

Rocky Mountain Collegian Editorial

The fact that George is an idiot that is continually embarrassing this country is not really news in itself these days. But at least it gives us something to make fun of. So in honor of my trip to Vegas this weekend where the average temperature will be 99 degrees, here’s a classic Will Ferrell impersonation.