So in their most recent issues, Entertainment Weekly has named the Top 100 New Classic Films of the last 25 years.

Ignoring the numerous films that clearly do not belong on there (Casino Royale and Clueless, anyone?), let me list you a few movies that did not even make the list. Remember, this is a list of 100 classic films from the last 25 years…

The Usual Suspects
A Christmas Story
American Beauty
Braveheart
Bull Durham
Forrest Gump
Hoosiers
Return of the Jedi
A Few Good Men
Ferris Beuller’s Day Off

And to top it off (and I’m honestly not joking), THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION is not on the list!! The movie that is consistently ranked #1 or #2 of all time by IMDB, rated in the top 100 of all time by dozens of lists, including AFI, does not even make the TOP 100 OF THE LAST 25 YEARS.

Entertainment Weekly, you and the mentally handicapped rhesus monkeys that you had compile this list are officially irrelevant.

Is that Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie? Jesus, I’ve never seen a couple of bigger bitches…
Hey, I might not buy cookies from those little fuckers everytime I see them at the store, but I’ve never once contemplated taking their money. That’s like walking up to the guy in the Santa outfit, ringing the bell, and sticking your hand in his bucket and taking the change he’s collected over the last few hours, standing in the fucking cold. Assholes.

Californian Assemblyman Jim Beall Junior is no Mr. Cool Ice, but he surely is deserving of being the Douche Bag of the Week. The Democrat from the San Jose area has proposed a tax on beer that would raise more than $2 billion for costs associated with alcohol-related emergencies like traffic accidents, beer goggles domestic violence and illnesses. If approved, the tax would increase the cost of a can or bottle of beer by 30 cents!

What. The. Fuck.

Tell me, looking at this photo of Mr. Beall, this guy has to be throwing down the beers on the regular. Isn’t he hurting himself here? Not to mention, in the lovely State of California, you can buy hard liquor at grocery stores, so isn’t this going to just encourage the purchase of hard alcohol instead of beer? Or even worse, force people to buy more of that shit alcohol, like Mike’s Hard Lemonade or wine coolers.

Seriously, Mr. Beall, you should reconsider. After you lose your job because of this tax, you’ll be looking for the cheapest beer possible.

Original Story: CBS 13.

No, that’s not a typo or a joke. Seems that a submersible, open-top car/submarine is exactly what the Swiss have invented.

And the picture to the right is not a joke either, even though it looks like it should be painted on the side of a van, that’s actually it!

It’s called the sQuba, and it has a top speed on land of 77mph, though it slows to a speedy 1.8mph underwater. And yes, if you go underwater, you will have to use a SCUBA apparatus to breathe, because you will be completely exposed to the water. Because it’s, you know, a fucking convertible.

The car, of which there is only one in existence, and which has (as far as I can tell) zero practical application, cost $1.5 million to make. Meanwhile my wireless internet keeps cutting in and out. Way to prioritize, scientists!

Original article here, including video of this idiotic thing.

This is what happens when you marry a comedian…your marriage becomes a joke.

These are Chinese menus with hilarious examples of mistranslated or just pain weird English.

Check out the first dish on the menu to the right.

Yummy!

I just wanted to eat the cow, but whatever…

If you find this kind of stuff as funny as I do, check out engrish.com for more such funny business.

I have no idea what’s going on here. Maybe a special-ed drama class decided to put on a play? Man, I hope I’m not going to hell just for watching this.