I’m not a love guru but if you ask a woman to marry you and she responds by slapping, punching, scratching and then throwing knives at you I think you can safely assume two things. One, your potential bride is batshit crazy. Two, her answer is most likely no.

Bruce Montle had to call the cops to come rescue his ass after he proposed marriage to Celeste Lagrant (pictured right) and she responded with aggravated domestic battery.

I just hope Bruce was smart enough to put all his worldly possessions in a box and get the hell out of the house before this crazy lady made bail and the cops released her.

Original Story: Tampa Bay 10

Not only can you run in high heels Kelly Ripa, but you could also use those high heels as a weapon. A Seattle woman went to the hospital, with what doctors called an “aggressive” bacterial infection, after being stabbed in her hand by a man using her own stiletto high heel boot.

Over the June 29 weekend, the woman was attending a BBQ when “an acquaintance asked her to perform a sex act on him. When she refused, the man slapped her face, removed her boot and stabbed her in the left hand with the stiletto heel, police said.” - according to an article in The Seattle Times.

This is pretty hardcore. If you watch Flavor of Love or Rock of Love, you know that the a girl-fight is getting comical serious when one of the girls takes off her shoe and starts swinging it around like a deranged lunatic. I never really imagined it doing much harm, but this is good to know.

Thanks to Phamtastic for passing on the goodness. Original story: The Seattle Times